The Pros & Cons of Washington, DC

Ever since I moved my friends have been constantly asking me how things are going, what I've been up to, how is the city, blah blah blah.

Since nothing else really interesting has happened to me lately (other than working two weeks in a row without an off-day and falling in love with raspberry beer) I've decided to answer everyone in-masse. Who knows, maybe new DC residents will find this list helpful? Probably not.

We'll start with the good and move onto the bad.

DC's Pros:
- MUSIC SCENE. Since living here I've seen We Are Scientists, and on Tuesday I'll be seeing Of Montreal. Last month I missed the Crystal Method, and this weekend I will be missing Vampire Weekend and Beach House, but down the line I can look forward to the Foals, Benny Benassi, Sara Bareilles, Klaxons, Stars, Rogue Wave, The xx, Rob Zombie, and Interpol, just to name a few. Will I actually make it to all of those events? No, I'm too poor, but I'll certainly be at some of them. Having so many different wonderful shows come through the area not only has me thrilled but overloaded. In addition I just so happen to live within two miles of the Black Cat and the 9:30 Club, which makes life even sweeter.
- FOOD. Gone are the days of McDonalds, Waffle House, shitty produce from Wal-Mart, and redundant chain restaurants. If I want to eat cheap I can pick up wallet-friendly yet delicious ethnic food from one of the many restaurants near my apartment, or from one of the food trucks, if I want to spend some cash I have so many ridiculously good places to choose from I have no choice but to use Urbanspoon as a decision maker. Grocery shopping is fun, you have your staples like Whole Foods, Safeway, Giant, and Harris Teeter, but you also have your farmer's markets, bodegas, and other small local markets that carry a delicious inventory.
- WEATHER. Sure, it's been pretty hot lately, but compared to the beaches of Alabama, it's nothing. The cooler days have been fantastic and I'm thrilled for fall and winter to arrive. Seasons are nice to have after living somewhere that has a persistent summer and a few chilly days.
- PEOPLE. I've met so many awesome people in DC, heard so many different opinions, and learned so many new things, it's awesome. Who knows how many people I could meet in a years time, let alone five years time.
- ART. Whether it be films, photography, paintings, graffiti, it's everywhere, the new, the old, the classy and respected, and the gritty and offensive, and I love it.
- IKEA. Okay well technically it's in Maryland and not really a big deal, but I love IKEA so it's going on the list.
- IT'S THE CAPITOL. I don't care much about the monuments, and the National this and the National that, but I think everyone who lives here has to admit, it does feel nice to live in the most politically powerful city in the world.
- GAY PEOPLE. They're everywhere, and every time I run into a fabulous gay man I want to grab him by the hand and run off to Georgetown and buy chocolates at Dean & Deluca and just have a jolly good time. (Disclaimer: I was raised by lesbians, and various gay men are as close as I got to having any father figures, so I'm just destined to want to bond with them all.)
- ROCK CREEK PARK. If you come to DC, go there, if you live here and don't like it, fuck you. RCP is sooooooooo awesome, I feel like I'm nowhere near DC when I'm there and that is a feat my friend.

DC's Cons:
- PARKING TICKETS. I'm very nearly convinced the parking enforcement people that work in DC are Nazi's. Where to park, when to park, and how long to stayed parked, has been on the forefront of my mind ever since I got here. I've spent so much money on tickets, it's not even remotely something I want to joke about.
- TRAFFIC. It's gotten to the point where if my destination is over 3 miles away, I usually don't go. If you call me while I'm driving in DC, pretty much the entire time I'm just going to be yelling at people that can't even hear me and flipping off cab drivers. There's also this stoplight on New Jersey Ave, right before the M St intersection before you turn onto New York Ave by 395, that I have to go through everyday to get to work, and I swear to you, the light only stays green for FIVE FUCKING SECONDS. I want to take that stoplight, tie it to a large heavy object, and sink it into the middle of the Pacific ocean so I never have to look at it again.
- PEOPLE. I know I listed people as a pro, but it's also a con. Homeless people begging you for money all the time and then giving you dirty looks when you don't give in. Assholes on the Metro who stand on the left side of the escalator and don't board the trains correctly. Any and all tourists. Snooty pretentious bitches. Creepy guys. There's a great deal of annoying people here, but really that goes for any large city.
- METRO. I used to really love the Metro, enjoy riding it, and thought it was the bee's knees. Then I had to use it to get me to work, and all those happy feelings went flying through the window. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate Metro, I do still enjoy it when I'm not in a hurry and I do feel it's superior to many other cities public transportation, but you can only deal with so many delays and fuck-ups before you just give up.
- PUBLIC SERVICES. Need a trash-can? Well it's not easy to get one. Need a driver's license? It's not easy to get one. Need a parking pass? It's not easy to get one. What happens if you don't get these things? Fines. 'Nuff said.
- H ST CONSTRUCTION. If you don't have to deal with it you're lucky, I feel like I'm killing my car every time I drive down H St.

Obviously, the pros far outweigh the cons for me and I love this city. You can greatly reduce your daily stress by not owning a car and just riding a bike everywhere. I'm glad I'm finally back in my hometown, and I don't know if I'll ever leave again.

By the way, if you're up for arguably the best sandwiches in DC, come see me at work at Taylor Gourmet, the K St location at the corner of 5th. I promise we'll cure your munchies.





PS. The awesome photos in this post are taken by Danilo Lewis, and appear here.

<33

Getting you up to speed, and looking at hot men.

So much has happened over the last couple of weeks I can't even begin to cover it all. I will give you an update in the form of a short, non-descriptive list though.

- My apartment is the mother fucking bomb.
- I'm no longer funemployed, and actually have a pretty legit job.
- My dog, cat, and most of my personal belongings are still waiting for me to come pick them up from the oily beaches of Alabama.
- Until I can do that I've been scoring cheap/free shit off Craigslist, which I have come to worship.
- I managed to get drunk in a public place with some agreeable people here in DC and then very nearly pissed myself waiting on the Metro on my way home, so take that how you will.
- Numerous friends are planning visits.
- Who knew the P St Whole Foods had a parking deck? I didn't, apparently I'm blind. This would have been helpful the first week I was here.
- I saw We Are Scientists, this should automatically make you envious of me.
- The fact that it was 67 degrees last night and 80 something back in Alabama makes me feel just a teensy bit superior.
- I went through a 24+ hour long power outage and spent most of that time riding my bike in Rock Creek Park, so as to come home sweaty and even more over heated. I make wonderful decisions you guys.
- I got around to watching Jesus Camp, and it legitimately instilled a sense of dread in me.
- I don't want to watch anymore sex scenes on movies or TV shows until my boyfriend is here and that's final. I feel like a starved Ethiopian child, but it has nothing to do with food.
- Parking tickets, wamp wamp wamp.
- Centipedes are terrifying.

So there you have it. Not really short, and a tad descriptive, so I'm sorry I lied.

Now that I have a home, stable job, and most importantly, a fast internet connection, I'm going to attempt to start writing more regularly on here. Key word, attempt. No promises. If anyone who read this blog in the past remembers particular things they liked to read about let me know. Although I foresee getting zero comments on this post, due to my steady absence lately.

Now, onto what obsessions with hot actors can lead to:



Inception:
This movie dealt with dreams, within dreams, within dreams. If that sentence doesn't fucking blow your mind, then the movie at least probably will. First, wonderful cast, Leonardo DiCaprio, Ellen Page, and my former 500 Days of Summer crush. Second, interesting, unique storyline. Third, extremely fucking visually appealing. I'm not saying go see this movie on drugs, but I'm not not saying go see this movie on drugs.

I give it five out of five, easily.



The Kids Are All Right:
Ever since I first saw Mark Ruffalo in XX/XY way back in the day I have thought of him as one of the sexiest guys ever (in my opinion he rivals Johnny Depp, it's that serious). So if he stars in a movie, I will more than likely find a way to see it, as soon as humanly possible. This movie not only stars him, but is about two kids with lesbian parents who get in touch with their biological father (the sperm donor for the lezzies). Having lesbian parents myself, and not knowing my father, I can obviously relate to this, although don't think for a second Ruffalo still isn't the main reason I made my way to the theater to see it. Anyways, I really throughly enjoyed this movie, I thought the entire cast did a great job of acting, most notably Julianne Moore, it was extremely funny at times, and most importantly of all: MARK RUFFALO SEX SCENES.

Do you even have to ask? I give it five out of five.

I know, two five stars in a row. To be fair, the second one would have gotten five stars even if the acting had been deplorable solely for those sex scenes.

That's all for now. Before I go though, I just found this in the depths of my personal files on my laptop, and because I'm now extremely creeped out, I'd like to creep you out, so here you go:



You're welcome.

<33

P.S. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

I has an apartment in DC. FINALLY!!!!!!11!!

After years (literally, YEARS) of planning on moving back up here to my hometown and escaping the hellhole that is (and will always be) Alabama, I am here, and I have an apartment. Finding one didn't take as long as I imagined. Not only did it not take long, somehow I ended up getting a badass basement apartment. Not a cramped, stuffy studio, which I expected. Somehow I got this:



That's just the living room. There's so much more! Yes, I know you're jealous. It's okay though, you shouldn't be, because while I do have an awesome pad, I'm still funemployed. Although it's more so terrifying than it is "fun". So while I've been running around DC trying to find a job (Read: Getting lost, over heated, and generally feeling worthless), I've been partaking in some other activities I'm going to tell you about now! Activities that all cost money. So I should probably stop. I should probably hole up in my new basement apartment with a shitload of Ramen noodles and never go do anything ever again. Well at least until I find a job. We'll see.

Anyways!!



Predators:
Eh. That's really my entire review of this movie. Just, eh. I was expecting to be pretty scared (watch the trailer) and I wasn't scared AT ALL. Never. It was just like watching a gory, more intelligent, involving version of a deer hunting trip. Nice visual effects, decent acting, Adrien Brody took his shirt off (a certain fellow immature friend of mine will appreciate that), and there is this one scene where one of the monsters rips out a guys spinal cord with the skull attached with his bare hands. That was pretty sweet. All in all though, I was just slightly disappointed.

I give it three out of five.



Sushi-Go-Round and Tapas:
Stopped in here for some food today while waiting for my movie to begin. Good service, good sushi, decently priced. I enjoyed watching the food roll past me on the conveyor belt. It's a neat little place, if you're down to try it, it's inside the Gallery Place building next to the Verizon Center in Chinatown. Take this recommendation with a grain of salt though. Saying I dislike any sushi is like saying I dislike sex. It just doesn't happen that often.



We Are Scientists:
I get to see them this Friday at Black Cat. And I am so fucking excited. WAS have been one of my favorite bands (maybe my favorite band) for a while now. When I arrived in the city last week, seeing them this week was the last thing I expected.

DC, I love you.

Just please give me a job.

<33

PS. I kept saying "my apartment". Just want to backtrack and say, that actually, it's "our apartment", our being me and my wonderfully, perfect boyfriend! He's not here yet, but he will be soon, and when that happens, DC will be even better. I love you Daniel. ;)

PPS. Yes, I'm aware that we're so cute it's gross and you hate me right now. Bye!

A smorgasbord of stuff for everyone!

Before I start, I'd like you to know that I did not know how to spell "smorgasbord" and when I Googled it, I found out that "smorgasbord" serves many different purposes:

- A collection containing a variety of sorts of things.
- A type of Scandinavian meal served buffet-style with multiple dishes of various foods on a table, originating in Sweden. In Norway it is called koldtbord and in Denmark it is called kolde bord.
- The second album by popular children's entertainers Sharon, Lois & Bram, originally released in 1979.

Moving on, it's been a while since I've reviewed any movies, so we'll have some of that. I'll also be updating you on what's going on in my life, which is more or less just going to be me complaining. You're welcome.

Onto the films, shall we?



Eclipse:
C'mon! You knew it was coming! It's almost like I have to considering I reviewed the other two pre-teen jerk off films. Maybe that was a little harsh, but I don't care. The reason New Moon was so much more bearable was because, for the most part, Edward wasn't in it. Jacob's acting isn't much better, but I'll take his macho werewolf crap over mister "I'm consistently in deep emotional pain and it shooooows" vampire. Eclipse brought me back to the days of the first movie, when I was writhing in my seat trying to calm myself down from the intensely uncomfortable awkward romantic scenes. Except this time I was accompanied my two of my good friends, who such as myself, have the maturity level of five year olds. Instead of being uncomfortable we were simply laughing our asses off (read: trying to be quiet but unable to control the laughter, causing crying, causing more laughter, causing us to spill our food everywhere [what a damn waste of Rasinets] causing more laughter, causing the fact that the entire theater probably hated us). I don't feel as bad as I should, I know due to the fact they they get married and go on a honeymoon and (SPOILER ALERT!!!!!) have sex, laughter is how I'm going to get through the fourth movie, Breaking Dawn. As with New Moon, the ONLY thing keeping this movie from going straight to the bottom of my list is the werewolves, and in particular, the intense werewolf/ Cullen tribe vs. newborn vampires battle scene. I may have involuntarily clapped when the werewolves jumped out of the forest. I may have involuntarily clapped twice. I tried to find a picture of that scene, but Google must be a twelve year old girl, since the only thing I could find is the above. I'm sorry.

While Twilight got two, and New Moon four (due to less Edward and more werewolves), this one will have to settle with three out of five (Edward came back, but still lots of werewolves). Also, if you can just make it funny, it's worth seeing.



Get Him To The Greek:
Totally different story! Any movie that can make me laugh my ass off hysterically simply because the main characters are so fucked up on drugs they stroke a furry wall for comfort, is more than enough to make it one of the best movies ever in my opinion. After seeing it I thought maybe I just enjoyed it because of my rampant immaturity, but I have yet to talk to anyone who doesn't completely agree with me. I don't know what else to tell you, other than: LOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLZOZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!

I give it five out of five.

Gaynelle and I also came to the conclusion by the end of the movie that Russell Brand is a sexy man (albeit a little gay), which is another supporting reason to go see it.



Now onto my complaints.

I'm going to DC on Wednesday to stay in a weekly rental, and hopefully find a permanent rental. I've been starving myself and hooking on the side all summer to be able to afford to move finally. Alright, that's not true at all, but it's makes my plight so much more desperate if you just go with it. Anywhoo, this week I plan on riding my bike all over DC begging landlords to give me an apartment, and I'm hoping the weather will be kind and not ridiculously hot, because I'm preparing for this to take for-fucking-ever, considering I'm trying to find something affordable but big enough for a couple (yes, boyfriend is moving in with me, I know, wheeeee!), but also something that accepts my cat and large moderately sized dog. You know all those movies where kids move to big cities to make it on their own and they have to stay in a really tiny studio and eat Ramen noodles all year, but it still works out and they're super duper happy? Well, finding a really tiny studio to accept you isn't easy and noodles get expensive, and even when you know the city like I do, it's STILL hard. Breathing feels expensive right now. I've got a good bit of money saved up, but I'm afraid to buy a .50 cent soda because I know enough of those will eventually lead to the disappearance of all my money and gahhhhh, it's so stressful.

Anyways, as much as I'd like to stay in Gulf Shores, AL and collect dirty oil money from BP (hah, NOT), my first steps to finally leaving start this week. Hopefully by mid August I'll be living in a studio in Northwest, serving tables at some fancy place in DuPont, and living a jolly little life.

So, adieu for now, I will be checking in sometime next week to update everyone on how my apartment search is going (yes the blog is coming back, as I told you it would when I moved). Wish me luck!

<33

PS. I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED ABOUT THIS, I CAN'T BELIEVE I ALMOST FORGOT TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT, OMG, DON'T JUDGE ME, BUT YEAH HERE YOU GO. Sorry for the all caps there for a second. Got carried away...

Time for some other highlights.

I never really had time to write more about the DC trip until now. I'm going to make this short.

It was awesome, Alabama sucks.

That's all I got. No, really, Fotoweek was amazing. The Metro didn't take too long to get me anywhere while I rode it, so no complaints there. The energy prior to the Capitols game in Chinatown was awesome and for the first time in my life I wanted to go to a hockey game. I actually think once I move up to DC I may just get into sports. I can't believe I just said that, but yeah. I think it's gonna happen.



Tono Sushi: Good as always. They have some amazing sushi. They have expanded their menu since the last time I ate there and my Mom got Thai (as always) and that was good too. When I live in DC I will definitely be getting food delivered from them if I live close enough. The spicy tuna rolls are making me hungry just thinking about them.

As mentioned already, Fotoweek along with the permanent museums all over DC definitely gave me my fix in art. I think browsing art is one of the most important activities one can partake in, unless of course you just don't appreciate art, and if you're one of those people you're a douchebag and I don't want to ever talk to you again. Seriously. Art is one of the few things I think the human race got right.





Those are spaces in which one can go through a huge range of emotion.

Georgetown, thanks again for reminding me that I am broke as shit. If I ever win the lottery I will definitely spend a huge amount of it on clothing in that neighborhood.

All in all, the trip was a success, and I had a great time with mi madre.



The trip back was the suck. We got caught in the remnants of "hurricane" Ida and it took a whopping 19 hours to get home (usually takes 14-15). I kept having to pull over because of the storm, the truckers decided it was a perfect time to drive like complete jackasses, the rain turned into tiny little ice crystals, and it was fucking freeeeeezing. Mostly due to the high winds (that blew my tiny Celica all over the interstate).

There was one thing we experienced on the way home that made the long drive worth it. Maybe you had to have been there, but it was the funniest thing I've seen in a while, and somehow, I got a picture of it with the cellular.



We actually had to hop over it multiple times, and well of course we didn't tell him it was there! I don't think it would have been so funny, if not for the immense length of the toilet paper. Poor guy. Hahahahaha.

That's it for now. I'm off to wallow in my depression stemming from being back in Alabama. I will also be stuck here for longer than previously planned, due to the fact that my army friend (a best friend) is coming back for New Years, and I don't feel right about not taking the opportunity to see him. So I will wait. All I can say is, 2010, don't let me down.

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George Clooney & Kevin Spacey.

The Men Who Stare At Goats:
I mean, with those two actors, what more can I say? I definitely enjoyed this movie. I heard mixed reviews before seeing it, but I was quite happy with it. The dark humor appealed to me (as usual), and I was lolz-ing all over the place. Completely unrealistic (yet apparently based on truth?), but as most of you know from my other movie reviews, that doesn't usually matter to me if it's funny. Kevin Spacey was a genius as always, and George Clooney was great too (and sexy I might add). I also enjoyed Ewan McGregor and Jeff Bridges' roles too. Good actors, funny stuff, go see this movie if you want to laugh. That is, if you enjoy dark humor.

I give it four out of five.

Oh and as for my travels in DC today, I need to go to sleep, so details will come later. Suffice it to say, that the photography of Fotoweek 2009 almost brought on tears, my knees hurt from walking, and I am even more saddened at the prospect of returning to Alabama tomorrow (after spending another full day doing fun shit).

So, look forward to that recap!

<33

So far, DC hasn't failed, as always.

Wednesday night will suck. It will suck hard. HARD. I do not want to go back to Alabama. Alabama with all of it's nothingness. Ew. Ew, ew, ew.

Real quick like, before we go into more of me loving DC, watch this and be merry. Thanks to Cat of Young Old Crone for bringing this to my attention via Twitter.



So far we really haven't done all that much in the city. The majority of our time has been comprised of sitting around talking, smelling the fall smells (something Alabama lacks also), and people watching. It's been nice to just be, for once. We have however briefly visited the mall, just because it's good to glimpse that when you haven't seen it in months (or years in my mother's case). We've also done some healthy walking in Chinatown, Dupont Circle, Adams Morgan, Woodley Park, and Takoma (hotel location). We've eaten some excellent food as well. If you follow me on Twitter (which, by "god", you better be doing by now) you will know all about these great eats, but alas, recap time:

7-Eleven: I'm sorry, but I won't ever stop eating their hotdogs. It may not be anything more than cheap gas station food, but it's damn good cheap gas station food, and it's something I hate not having access to in Alabama, because I would eat the fuck out of it all the time, as I do here.
Asian Spice: We tried the Thai food here (Basil chicken) and it was delicious. Not only that, but we also sat outside, watched some fine ass people walk by, and enjoyed the perfect weather. The restaurant was incredibly nice on the inside too. I'll be visiting this place again for sure.
The Diner: 24 hour diner in Adams Morgan. I have decided that when I move here, this will be one of the first places I apply for a job at. The staff was awesome, and omfg, the food. Ridiculously good. Cheap too. The toast with the spinach and artichoke dip was what we started with (wonderful). Mom got a sandwich, but I got the grilled stuffed Portobellos, and it was soooooo good. I'm in love with this place.

Tono Sushi will be on the menu tomorrow. We tried tonight but got there right before they closed (we often lose track of time). I am glad though that we missed Tono because then we would not have eaten at the Diner.

Tomorrow we have a long day. Realizing that we have wasted two days doing nothing but walking and eating has made us decide to get up super early and get shit done tomorrow. One thing includes enjoying some of the activities of Fotoweek 2009! We are lucky to have randomly visited the city at this time, there is stuff going on for Fotoweek everywhere. I am taking pictures as well, but they are not so amazing thanks to my crappy half broken camera and I am tired and need to sleep soon so those will come later.

Speaking of sleep, I'm off to try and get some of that. Long day tomorrow, looking forward to some of this:



Also, I am too lazy to look up what this is, but we discovered it in the middle of a very residential neighborhood in front of a normal looking house with no other signs:



I'm assuming a family business and something to do with martial arts or calligraphy, but I'm lazy and want to present a challenge, so the first person to explain in depth wins a cookie! Okay, not really, but you will win an e-cookie (it's so much better, trust me).

Peace out.

<33

Hey there, Washington, DC...

I'm excited to be seeing you again. *Raises eyebrows*

Seriously though, I have some questions. Well one. All that traffic today, on a Sunday? The FUCK? If that HOV lane had not been opened, I might have committed suicide. I usually don't mind DC traffic (Read: Tolerate it, but still dislike it), but this afternoon when we arrived I was running on two hours of sleep. Two hours of sleep I got about 30 hours ago. Two hours of sleep I got about 30 hours ago, on top of 9 hours of work before driving 15 hours to DC. You bitches.

Regardless, I love this city. If you know me, you know that. I was born in Fairfax, VA, and the DC area is my home base. I was raised in Alabama for the most part, but I've always hated Alabama, and I've always found myself drawn back to DC. Hence why this is my seventh time here in the last few years, and why I plan on moving back here and going to college.

This city could beat me like an abusive husband and I would come crawling back to it, saying I could love no other. It's that real. Yeah.

If you follow me on Twitter (which you better), then you already know I've been tweeting about the trip like crazy. If you'd like a ongoing description of everything, I'm here for you.

The reason this trip is so important, compared to the others, is that this trip is the last trip. Next time I come up here (1-3 months) I will not leave. Yeah, I'd be excited if I was you too.

Anyways, I'm off to run around spending money. I'm so excited to sit down on the Metro and let it take me everywhere as opposed to driving. Even though Metro hasn't been doing so great from what I've heard, but it's better than driving in my current condition.

If any of you know of anything super fun going on in DC during the next three days, let me know!

<33

Holy hell...

Hah, two things I do not believe in whatsoever!

First off, to make up for not writing, I give you this:



I found it pretty entertaining, to say the least.

Secondly, wow, someone forgot how much shit you have to do when moving! My Mom is moving to DC this weekend (I am taking her up there) and this week has been insanely chaotic, what with helping her and working and recovering from Halloween.

Yes kids, Halloween was a bit ridiculous. If you go back in my Twitter history some ways, you will see some things I don't even remember writing. Apparently at one point I did not even know where I was. The night was crazy, fun, and actually very safe in case you're worried (I know you aren't, assholes).

Anyways, so this week has been crazy, once I arrive in DC this weekend (Sunday to be specific) I may have time to write about something. It will probably be something regarding how much the Metro sucks. I hope the video made up for my absence.

See you guys in the city!

<33

PS. I may be moving up there as well sooner than I thought. We shall see!

Wow, I've been slacking!

Things have been busy. I can't remember the last time I had an off day. It's been pretty much a week and a half of work, sleep, maybe squeeze in some friend time, back to work or sleep.

I'm slacking on this so much but I will get right back to normal as soon as possible!

This weekend I will be in Nashville, and then next weekend hopefully a college friend I haven't seen in forever is coming down and then like two weeks after that I'll be going up to DC for four days. In between I will find time for you internet buddies, I will!

Yeah that's right, I'm going up to DC for four days in November. About fucking time. I just need to be "home" for a bit.

NEWS BULLET: It was my dog's birthday today, she is now six years old, RECOGNIZE! She can now stop aging, please.

So anyways, stay cool guys, your little midget apparently-middle-eastern-looking girl is not going anywhere!

I'll be back!

<33

Pssst! I may have a bit of a crush on someone. Oh em gee right!?

Bad mood guys, bad mood.

Seriously.

This is the only productive thing to come out of the last couple of days (well and the fourth sit of my sleeve, which I'll talk about later).



That and my other new photography can be found (and appreciated maybe?) on my Deviantart.

Everything else that has happened over the last couple of days has only solidified my opinion that I really do not enjoy living here. I need the city like I need oxygen.

I really don't have anything else to say right now. Sorry guys. Maybe I'll be in a better mood tomorrow. Everyone has their shitty moods.

<33

Tourists. I mean seriously?

This post at 2birds1blog made me decide to finally write that post about tourism I've been wanting to write all summer. WARNING: This post contains some heavy language as I tend to get pretty riled up about tourism.

Tourists can be good. They bring money to an area (especially mine, Gulf Shores, AL), they are interesting to watch sometimes, etc. Usually though, I just want to grab them and shake them uncontrollably while yelling "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING?!".

Let's examine some things shall we?

1) Driving.
They suck at it. I mean they suck fucking donkey balls at it. They drive twenty miles under the speed limit, they never use any signals, they ride your ass, or block you in the left lane. They look at you all horribly offended and what not when you pass them, or have your music turned up even a wee bit, or do anything that doesn't fit their pearly little image of their perfect vacation. Hey, you, with the fanny pack, I'm not on fucking vacation, I'm late for work, where I'll actually end up serving your kind, so can you please just meander over to the right lane (where you can literally go as slow as you want because in the common sense world that is what it's for!) and get the fuck out of my way. Mostly it's just tourists that don't follow the left is for cruising, right is for passing rule but sometimes LOCALS do it too and I hate them even more. When locals drive like jackasses it's just a downright betrayal. Unfortunately I live in Alabama where one is more likely to know how to drive a tractor then a car (JK Alabama, I have to poke fun at you sometimes though), but tourists still always outrank locals when it comes to shitty driving. They are just completely oblivious to the person behind them pumping their fists up and down, screaming, and swerving in anger (psh, yeah that's me!). They are instead moseying along in their minivan, looking at the 1,000th palm tree they've seen, getting excited over fucking sand, while not realizing they're going 20 mph in a 45. On a one lane road. Blocking traffic. Blocking traffic for miles. And miles. Forever. Hey, guess what? You wanna sight see? Fucking walk! Also, our ambulances, firetrucks, and police personnel are not toys. They're real. People have emergencies and die here too (I know, crazy!), so please move the fuck over. It marvels me how many of you just sit there like a retarded duck. One last thing, turning lanes, use them. Those arrows in the middle pointing to either direction, those are instructions. It's not just a big fucking blank spot to look at, it has a purpose. Purpose, people, PURPOSE.

2) Children.
Do you even know what your child is doing right now? Eating dog poop! Yeah, fucking look at them! I don't know why, but it seems that when people are on vacation they forget everything they've ever learned when it comes to social interaction, and this includes their kids. My friend Gaynelle recently told me a story about how this one kid in the restaurant she works at was literally shoving about fifty packets of sugar into his mouth, becoming more hyperactive by the second, and making a holy mess. When the parents were finally politely asked if they were seeing this, their response was, "Oh! Well we're on vacation so you know, yeah, whatever." and *shrug*. Um, what? Just because you're on vacation doesn't mean your kid all of a sudden became immune to sugar, the sugar is magically invisible and doesn't have to be cleaned up, and we're all deaf and can't hear your subsequently balls to the wall hyper spawn screaming at the top of his/her lungs. Some other points, when it's dark outside, and your kids run out into the middle of the road in traffic, and you do nothing to correct this because you're drunk (yeah, very drunk, all the time, because you're on fucking vacation), doesn't mean we're not going to kill your kids accidentally. You know why? Vacation doesn't magically give people crazy tiger night vision and super reflexes. What if we're drunk? Huh? Ever think of that? We freaking live here, on the beach, I mean, we should be drunk 24/7 right (since you certainly are)? Remember this next time.

3) You look and act like an idiot.
Seriously. Do you wear that at home? No? I didn't think so, so why in the hell would you wear it here?! I know a great thing about vacation is the fact that you can do anything stupid and no one knows you, but have some fucking dignity. Also, seriously? Do you act that way at home? You really block the aisle in the grocery store with your five shopping carts arguing with your co-vacationer about what you have and don't have at the condo, eventually just forcing me to be rude and grunt in a mean fashion while pushing your shit out of the way. I mean, seriously. *Sigh*

I can't write anymore because if I do, I'm liable to go buy a gun and blow my head off just thinking about it. If you're a tourist and you don't do any of this, well then kudos to you!

Although, I know you will continue to plague me in DC, where the meaning of "Walk left, stand right", will hold no meaning to you, no matter how many times locals push you out of the way.

God damn you ignorant tourist creature from hell. God damn you.

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Welcome to the college life.

Well not really, technically not until next fall, but I'm starting on education related activities now anyways. Long story short, I went through some things during my teenage hood that caused me to drop out of high school in the 9th grade and work full time. I have been working, constantly, since I can remember, and have now been able to slow down and get back on my educational track. I start GED classes this month, then will begin teaching myself advanced math (college preparation), with the help of my Mom's math addicted girlfriend.

I start college next fall, as stated already, and I am so excited I can barely stand the wait. I will be attending NOVA (Northern Virginia Community College) for two years and then transferring to GMU (George Mason University) for another two years, meaning I will end college at the age of 24, which is perfect even though I'm supposed to be class of '12, but hey at least I'm going to college.



NOVA- Annandale Campus, sits on 78 acres, pretty huge for a community college I think. My two years here will be spent working on an A.S. in Science. The only downside to this school, is the fact that I will have to drive from the district to Annandale everyday, and while it's not too terribly far, it's still driving in the DC area, which I despise, even for one mile. If anyone can tell me if any of the shuttles or buses run between the closest metro stop and the NOVA campus, I would love you forever! Though I could just ask them later on, haha.



GMU- Fairfax Campus, this is the one I'm really excited about. GMU was my second choice in universities and after realizing how incredibly difficult it is to get accepted into Georgetown (not to mention their Jesuit/Catholic identity), I went with GMU. Turns out NOVA (my CC of choice) and GMU specifically work together to seamlessly transfer students every year! How perfect! I will be going to GMU to get my B.A. in Biology. There is a metro stop servicing this campus too, and that is always a plus in my eyes.

Myself, my Mom, and her girlfriend all plan to move back to DC in the next two months or so. Not only because we are all suffocating in Alabama, but also because the sooner I establish myself up there the less time spent paying out of state tuition (you have to live in VA or DC for 12 months before you can get in state tuition rates and yes, DC counts as in state thanks to a grant that pays off most of the out of state tuition). I don't know how long I plan on living with them, it depends on how much time I'm going to end up spending at school. I already know the debt from both colleges is going to rack up pretty much immediately. Hello financial aid! I really don't want to live with them (I rather enjoy living on my own, seeing as how I'm an adult and all), but if I have to, to get through college, then I'm going to. Let's hope the next four or five years doesn't kill me.

Time for some funnies!



It's hilarious to watch the older people in the family attempt a go on the Dreamcast. Mainly because they completely spaz out with the controller. Look at the picture, see how they "turn" the controllers, trying so hard to defeat each other? Just wait until I get a video, you will laugh your ass off.



That wonderful funny is from Comixed. I strongly recommend you visit it!

My life other than the above has been pretty insignificant. It will probably stay that way until I move. Anyways, I'm off to watch a cartoon, so I can act like a child.

<33

In DC waiting on the Metro.

Damn train delays are annoying.

Anyways, we flew up here yesterday (myself and Abi), checked into the hotel, got coffee in Chinatown, then went to the Mall and took pictures around the cherry blossom trees, then went to a couple of museums and had lunch. Then we shopped a bit in Georgetown, and then saw a movie back in Chinatown. Then passed out after almost 48 hours with no sleep.

Today we plan on more shopping, eating in Woodley Park, then going clubbing.

I definitely don't want to come back. Actually I'm probably going to end up moving here very soon, alone. I just can't stand Gulf Shores anymore. So I'm not sure how I'm gonna do it but I want to move back up here by the end of summer. Which means I'm probably not getting a house in Gulf Shores after all.

Anyways, our train finally got here so I gotta go, byeeee.

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