That's why I haven't been here much. I know, excuses, excuses. I'm pretty sure I lost my pretty much non-existent readership I had anyways from not posting for so long so I don't think it matters. Anyways, updates, yes?
- Why is it still fucking hot? Where is my fall weather? Hurry the fuck up. - Chocolate stout is not as good as I expected and this makes me sad. - I'm learning Spanish and I am proud of that fact. - Friends are coming up from Alabama, maybe they will decide DC is the place to be. Then life would be even cooler! - My boyfriend makes me food all the time and then gets slightly offended when I don't try it immediately, and I constantly run out of beer. These are my problems you guys. - High definition TVs ARE everything they're cracked up to be. - I enjoy Chinatown so much more when intoxicated.
Alright, movie reviews? It's been a while!
The Social Network: Otherwise known as the Facebook movie. I thought this would be an alright movie and I was completely wrong. It was an awesome movie. I know everyone's like "Blah, blah, blah, it defines our generation", but it DOES. How do I know this? Well, I updated Facebook while I was watching it. How's that for a definition. If I have children and they have grandchildren, and those grandchildren ask me what life was like when I was young, I will more than likely just have them watch this movie. The acting was pretty wonderful in my opinion (except Timberlake, I just don't care for him), and the cinematography was awesome. My favorite scene regarding that aspect was the rowboat race scene where it looks to me like they used a tilt-shift lens to film it. I don't know much about that stuff, but that is what it looked like and it was pretty beautiful. Another great thing, was that the movie was dramatic, and also seriously funny. I really enjoyed it, go see it now!
I give it five out of five.
It's Kind of a Funny Story: I love Zach Galifianakis and he was probably the main reason I wanted to see this movie. It was decent, a cute story, a little sappy and a little too teenage drama filled for my liking. Also, since when is Vampire Weekend mentioned in movies? I swear hipsters are taking over our culture, completely. The main thing I liked about this movie was the artistic perspective dealing with the main characters drawings and how he thought of his art. It was different and pretty interesting.
I give it three out of five.
Adios you fine people, I'll talk to you next month probably. Or maybe not. I don't know. I plan on getting into some shenanigans this weekend, so I may have some good writing material then. Who knows.
Just running on two hours of sleep. For the past thirty-eight hours. During two separate work shifts on two different days.
So yeah, cracked out.
I should be sleeping, I should be curled up in a ball dreaming about the sex I'm not getting, but no, instead the last thirty-eight hours have been filled with far less healthy activities:
- Watching multiple (MULTIPLE) seasons of Weeds and fantasizing about beating the shit out of Silas for always being a dick to Nancy. - Spending an embarrassing amount of time stalking everyone I know on Facebook. - Instant messaging my best friend complaining about the sex I'm not getting. - Obsessively checking my bank account to see if my direct deposits have gone through, even though I have no bills due, and nothing I want to buy immediately. - Poking my cat repeatedly in the belly until he gets annoyed and tries to murder my hand which then really scares me because I always imagine the pain from his claws to be far worse than it is. - Giving my dog the evil eye every time she farts. - Searching the internet for the goriest, most fucked up horror movies I can find and then adding them to the Netflix queue. - Looking for bikes to buy, deciding on one, finding others, changing my mind, repeat. Repeat, repeat, repeat. - Eating the same salad from work for dinner and breakfast since I refuse to buy groceries so I can afford said bike. - Organizing the DVD collection into alphabetical order. - Smelling the men's cologne samples in my GQ magazines and debating internally about whether I could get away with wearing one just so I could smell myself all the time and be instantly happy. - And of course, Adult Swim, because no ridiculous amount of time spent awake for no reason would be complete without Adult Swim.
My original plan was to stay up all night, get through work, and then pass out, therefore fixing my sleeping schedule, since sleeping during the hours of 5AM-2PM makes it difficult to get anything productive done when you work afternoons/ evenings. Plan was going well. Until now. I'm tired, not gonna lie, but am I sleeping? No. Why? Because I'm fucking retarded and so easily distracted by things such as Robot Chicken that it is now 3AM and I am still awake. Not only awake but blogging.
Why do I do this to myself?
Anyways, my relatively new job has been amazing, my boyfriend will be here soon, and everything is going swell, so I guess I can't complain too much.
If you were hoping for something helpful like a movie review or a recap of local events, etc, I'm sorry, the only things I've been doing is working and everything listed above.
So much has happened over the last couple of weeks I can't even begin to cover it all. I will give you an update in the form of a short, non-descriptive list though.
- My apartment is the mother fucking bomb. - I'm no longer funemployed, and actually have a pretty legit job. - My dog, cat, and most of my personal belongings are still waiting for me to come pick them up from the oily beaches of Alabama. - Until I can do that I've been scoring cheap/free shit off Craigslist, which I have come to worship. - I managed to get drunk in a public place with some agreeable people here in DC and then very nearly pissed myself waiting on the Metro on my way home, so take that how you will. - Numerous friends are planning visits. - Who knew the P St Whole Foods had a parking deck? I didn't, apparently I'm blind. This would have been helpful the first week I was here. - I saw We Are Scientists, this should automatically make you envious of me. - The fact that it was 67 degrees last night and 80 something back in Alabama makes me feel just a teensy bit superior. - I went through a 24+ hour long power outage and spent most of that time riding my bike in Rock Creek Park, so as to come home sweaty and even more over heated. I make wonderful decisions you guys. - I got around to watching Jesus Camp, and it legitimately instilled a sense of dread in me. - I don't want to watch anymore sex scenes on movies or TV shows until my boyfriend is here and that's final. I feel like a starved Ethiopian child, but it has nothing to do with food. - Parking tickets, wamp wamp wamp. - Centipedes are terrifying.
So there you have it. Not really short, and a tad descriptive, so I'm sorry I lied.
Now that I have a home, stable job, and most importantly, a fast internet connection, I'm going to attempt to start writing more regularly on here. Key word, attempt. No promises. If anyone who read this blog in the past remembers particular things they liked to read about let me know. Although I foresee getting zero comments on this post, due to my steady absence lately.
Now, onto what obsessions with hot actors can lead to:
Inception: This movie dealt with dreams, within dreams, within dreams. If that sentence doesn't fucking blow your mind, then the movie at least probably will. First, wonderful cast, Leonardo DiCaprio, Ellen Page, and my former 500 Days of Summer crush. Second, interesting, unique storyline. Third, extremely fucking visually appealing. I'm not saying go see this movie on drugs, but I'm not not saying go see this movie on drugs.
I give it five out of five, easily.
The Kids Are All Right: Ever since I first saw Mark Ruffalo in XX/XY way back in the day I have thought of him as one of the sexiest guys ever (in my opinion he rivals Johnny Depp, it's that serious). So if he stars in a movie, I will more than likely find a way to see it, as soon as humanly possible. This movie not only stars him, but is about two kids with lesbian parents who get in touch with their biological father (the sperm donor for the lezzies). Having lesbian parents myself, and not knowing my father, I can obviously relate to this, although don't think for a second Ruffalo still isn't the main reason I made my way to the theater to see it. Anyways, I really throughly enjoyed this movie, I thought the entire cast did a great job of acting, most notably Julianne Moore, it was extremely funny at times, and most importantly of all: MARK RUFFALO SEX SCENES.
Do you even have to ask? I give it five out of five.
I know, two five stars in a row. To be fair, the second one would have gotten five stars even if the acting had been deplorable solely for those sex scenes.
That's all for now. Before I go though, I just found this in the depths of my personal files on my laptop, and because I'm now extremely creeped out, I'd like to creep you out, so here you go:
After years (literally, YEARS) of planning on moving back up here to my hometown and escaping the hellhole that is (and will always be) Alabama, I am here, and I have an apartment. Finding one didn't take as long as I imagined. Not only did it not take long, somehow I ended up getting a badass basement apartment. Not a cramped, stuffy studio, which I expected. Somehow I got this:
That's just the living room. There's so much more! Yes, I know you're jealous. It's okay though, you shouldn't be, because while I do have an awesome pad, I'm still funemployed. Although it's more so terrifying than it is "fun". So while I've been running around DC trying to find a job (Read: Getting lost, over heated, and generally feeling worthless), I've been partaking in some other activities I'm going to tell you about now! Activities that all cost money. So I should probably stop. I should probably hole up in my new basement apartment with a shitload of Ramen noodles and never go do anything ever again. Well at least until I find a job. We'll see.
Anyways!!
Predators: Eh. That's really my entire review of this movie. Just, eh. I was expecting to be pretty scared (watch the trailer) and I wasn't scared AT ALL. Never. It was just like watching a gory, more intelligent, involving version of a deer hunting trip. Nice visual effects, decent acting, Adrien Brody took his shirt off (a certain fellow immature friend of mine will appreciate that), and there is this one scene where one of the monsters rips out a guys spinal cord with the skull attached with his bare hands. That was pretty sweet. All in all though, I was just slightly disappointed.
I give it three out of five.
Sushi-Go-Round and Tapas: Stopped in here for some food today while waiting for my movie to begin. Good service, good sushi, decently priced. I enjoyed watching the food roll past me on the conveyor belt. It's a neat little place, if you're down to try it, it's inside the Gallery Place building next to the Verizon Center in Chinatown. Take this recommendation with a grain of salt though. Saying I dislike any sushi is like saying I dislike sex. It just doesn't happen that often.
We Are Scientists: I get to see them this Friday at Black Cat. And I am so fucking excited. WAS have been one of my favorite bands (maybe my favorite band) for a while now. When I arrived in the city last week, seeing them this week was the last thing I expected.
DC, I love you.
Just please give me a job.
<33
PS. I kept saying "my apartment". Just want to backtrack and say, that actually, it's "our apartment", our being me and my wonderfully, perfect boyfriend! He's not here yet, but he will be soon, and when that happens, DC will be even better. I love you Daniel. ;)
PPS. Yes, I'm aware that we're so cute it's gross and you hate me right now. Bye!
Before I start, I'd like you to know that I did not know how to spell "smorgasbord" and when I Googled it, I found out that "smorgasbord" serves many different purposes:
- A collection containing a variety of sorts of things. - A type of Scandinavian meal served buffet-style with multiple dishes of various foods on a table, originating in Sweden. In Norway it is called koldtbord and in Denmark it is called kolde bord. - The second album by popular children's entertainers Sharon, Lois & Bram, originally released in 1979.
Moving on, it's been a while since I've reviewed any movies, so we'll have some of that. I'll also be updating you on what's going on in my life, which is more or less just going to be me complaining. You're welcome.
Onto the films, shall we?
Eclipse: C'mon! You knew it was coming! It's almost like I have to considering I reviewed the other two pre-teen jerk off films. Maybe that was a little harsh, but I don't care. The reason New Moon was so much more bearable was because, for the most part, Edward wasn't in it. Jacob's acting isn't much better, but I'll take his macho werewolf crap over mister "I'm consistently in deep emotional pain and it shooooows" vampire. Eclipse brought me back to the days of the first movie, when I was writhing in my seat trying to calm myself down from the intensely uncomfortable awkward romantic scenes. Except this time I was accompanied my two of my good friends, who such as myself, have the maturity level of five year olds. Instead of being uncomfortable we were simply laughing our asses off (read: trying to be quiet but unable to control the laughter, causing crying, causing more laughter, causing us to spill our food everywhere [what a damn waste of Rasinets] causing more laughter, causing the fact that the entire theater probably hated us). I don't feel as bad as I should, I know due to the fact they they get married and go on a honeymoon and (SPOILER ALERT!!!!!) have sex, laughter is how I'm going to get through the fourth movie, Breaking Dawn. As with New Moon, the ONLY thing keeping this movie from going straight to the bottom of my list is the werewolves, and in particular, the intense werewolf/ Cullen tribe vs. newborn vampires battle scene. I may have involuntarily clapped when the werewolves jumped out of the forest. I may have involuntarily clapped twice. I tried to find a picture of that scene, but Google must be a twelve year old girl, since the only thing I could find is the above. I'm sorry.
While Twilight got two, and New Moon four (due to less Edward and more werewolves), this one will have to settle with three out of five (Edward came back, but still lots of werewolves). Also, if you can just make it funny, it's worth seeing.
Get Him To The Greek: Totally different story! Any movie that can make me laugh my ass off hysterically simply because the main characters are so fucked up on drugs they stroke a furry wall for comfort, is more than enough to make it one of the best movies ever in my opinion. After seeing it I thought maybe I just enjoyed it because of my rampant immaturity, but I have yet to talk to anyone who doesn't completely agree with me. I don't know what else to tell you, other than: LOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLZOZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!
I give it five out of five.
Gaynelle and I also came to the conclusion by the end of the movie that Russell Brand is a sexy man (albeit a little gay), which is another supporting reason to go see it.
Now onto my complaints.
I'm going to DC on Wednesday to stay in a weekly rental, and hopefully find a permanent rental. I've been starving myself and hooking on the side all summer to be able to afford to move finally. Alright, that's not true at all, but it's makes my plight so much more desperate if you just go with it. Anywhoo, this week I plan on riding my bike all over DC begging landlords to give me an apartment, and I'm hoping the weather will be kind and not ridiculously hot, because I'm preparing for this to take for-fucking-ever, considering I'm trying to find something affordable but big enough for a couple (yes, boyfriend is moving in with me, I know, wheeeee!), but also something that accepts my cat and large moderately sized dog. You know all those movies where kids move to big cities to make it on their own and they have to stay in a really tiny studio and eat Ramen noodles all year, but it still works out and they're super duper happy? Well, finding a really tiny studio to accept you isn't easy and noodles get expensive, and even when you know the city like I do, it's STILL hard. Breathing feels expensive right now. I've got a good bit of money saved up, but I'm afraid to buy a .50 cent soda because I know enough of those will eventually lead to the disappearance of all my money and gahhhhh, it's so stressful.
Anyways, as much as I'd like to stay in Gulf Shores, AL and collect dirty oil money from BP (hah, NOT), my first steps to finally leaving start this week. Hopefully by mid August I'll be living in a studio in Northwest, serving tables at some fancy place in DuPont, and living a jolly little life.
So, adieu for now, I will be checking in sometime next week to update everyone on how my apartment search is going (yes the blog is coming back, as I told you it would when I moved). Wish me luck!
<33
PS. I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED ABOUT THIS, I CAN'T BELIEVE I ALMOST FORGOT TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT, OMG, DON'T JUDGE ME, BUT YEAH HERE YOU GO. Sorry for the all caps there for a second. Got carried away...
I'm drunk (SHHHHHH), and hanging out with three of my best friends, Jessica, Robby, & Shawn. A random thought came to me just now and I decided, why not blog about it?
WHY THE FUCK DO PEOPLE POST PICTURES OF THEMSELVES ON FACEBOOK AND MYSPACE SITTING ON THE GOD DAMN TOILET!?!?!
I mean, why? Just... Why? Yes, we know you piss and shit just like everyone else in the world, but why in the fuck would you want to show everyone that? It just makes no sense to me, along the lines of God making no sense to me. I know this is completely fucking random, but these are the things I think about. Sooo there's that.
What's been going on in the blogosphere? I'm incredibly behind on everything, ever. I myself am STILL stuck in the hellhole I call Alabama, much to my dismay. If I don't make it up to DC soon suicide may be an option. It's hot here, there's oil everywhere, Christians keep yelling at me for liking Obama. I need to get the fuck out of here.
As for what's going on in my life, um, here's the breakdown:
GOOD: I was lucky enough to find the best guy in the world and he's now my perfect boyfriend! Inorite!? Who would've guessed right?
So much has been going on lately. Bad, good, horrible, amazing. All at once. I don't have time to update you all on what I'm talking about, but I will eventually. I just wanted to drop in to say that I haven't forgotten about this and I still plan on resuming writing regularly. Just not right now.
You can blame them. Really. Having a social life, hah! What is that like these days? I wouldn't know. On the upside I'm making a good bit of money. Saving most of it, but also able to do some things I've needed to do for a while (like finish my sleeve, it'll be done soon hopefully).
So to the internet: Sorry I have abandoned you over the last few... Months? I have some things in mind to write about and I will if I can find the time, promise! I know you're all dying so much more bored without my input on random topics.
To my real friends: In case you were wondering I'm not dead! I'm sorry I haven't seen any of you (and I mean any of you). Maybe some day! Just please don't get mad at me because I really am working a lot.
You can still follow me faithfully on Twitter since I've been great at keeping up with that via the mobile device.
Speaking of the mobile device, before I sign off for another two months (kidding... hopefully) I'm getting a new mobile device! Still Android based, but in my opinion, the best smartphone out there!
Writing daily or even every other day is just not going to happen right now. I expect to bring this blog back up to full force once I live in Washington, DC. Or once I get internet at my house. Either one. Until then I'll continue to write of course, but they're gonna be pretty spaced out. Sorry to all (few) of you.
- It's December. Yesterday we had a mini hurricane and it was in the 50s, then jumped to the 70s, now it's back down to the 40s. What. The. Fuck.
- It's December. Possibly my favorite month?
- It's December. I still live here.
- Grrrrr.
- Thanksgiving was not nearly as awkward as I feared it would be. My tattoos and stretched earlobes are subjects I don't think some of my family members even knew about. They said not a thing about my sleeve and barely commented on the ears, to say "That's okay for the Africans, but not for you." Okay, I can handle that. Otherwise it was actually very nice.
- I have some time to pass, and I'm spending much of it reading, trying to immerse myself in the stories. I'm also sort of poor at the moment (trying to save and not spend) so I'm re-reading shit I already have. Mostly re-reading long shit. The Twilight saga (I know, I know), Harry Potter, Phillip Pullman's Dark Materials, Chronicles of Narnia, and if I get desperate enough I will try to read the entire bible (mostly for laughs). I started with Twilight. Those books make me want to fall in love with someone (again). It's completely ridiculous. The other stories will do the same. I remember being absolutely angry that Hogwarts wasn't a real place. The point of all this is to distract myself from reality. I have some waiting to do, and I'm impatient as fuck, so I think this is the best plan.
First off, to make up for not writing, I give you this:
I found it pretty entertaining, to say the least.
Secondly, wow, someone forgot how much shit you have to do when moving! My Mom is moving to DC this weekend (I am taking her up there) and this week has been insanely chaotic, what with helping her and working and recovering from Halloween.
Yes kids, Halloween was a bit ridiculous. If you go back in my Twitter history some ways, you will see some things I don't even remember writing. Apparently at one point I did not even know where I was. The night was crazy, fun, and actually very safe in case you're worried (I know you aren't, assholes).
Anyways, so this week has been crazy, once I arrive in DC this weekend (Sunday to be specific) I may have time to write about something. It will probably be something regarding how much the Metro sucks. I hope the video made up for my absence.
See you guys in the city!
<33
PS. I may be moving up there as well sooner than I thought. We shall see!
Things have been busy. I can't remember the last time I had an off day. It's been pretty much a week and a half of work, sleep, maybe squeeze in some friend time, back to work or sleep.
I'm slacking on this so much but I will get right back to normal as soon as possible!
This weekend I will be in Nashville, and then next weekend hopefully a college friend I haven't seen in forever is coming down and then like two weeks after that I'll be going up to DC for four days. In between I will find time for you internet buddies, I will!
Yeah that's right, I'm going up to DC for four days in November. About fucking time. I just need to be "home" for a bit.
NEWS BULLET: It was my dog's birthday today, she is now six years old, RECOGNIZE! She can now stop aging, please.
So anyways, stay cool guys, your little midget apparently-middle-eastern-looking girl is not going anywhere!
I'll be back!
<33
Pssst! I may have a bit of a crush on someone. Oh em gee right!?
