A smorgasbord of stuff for everyone!

Before I start, I'd like you to know that I did not know how to spell "smorgasbord" and when I Googled it, I found out that "smorgasbord" serves many different purposes:

- A collection containing a variety of sorts of things.
- A type of Scandinavian meal served buffet-style with multiple dishes of various foods on a table, originating in Sweden. In Norway it is called koldtbord and in Denmark it is called kolde bord.
- The second album by popular children's entertainers Sharon, Lois & Bram, originally released in 1979.

Moving on, it's been a while since I've reviewed any movies, so we'll have some of that. I'll also be updating you on what's going on in my life, which is more or less just going to be me complaining. You're welcome.

Onto the films, shall we?



Eclipse:
C'mon! You knew it was coming! It's almost like I have to considering I reviewed the other two pre-teen jerk off films. Maybe that was a little harsh, but I don't care. The reason New Moon was so much more bearable was because, for the most part, Edward wasn't in it. Jacob's acting isn't much better, but I'll take his macho werewolf crap over mister "I'm consistently in deep emotional pain and it shooooows" vampire. Eclipse brought me back to the days of the first movie, when I was writhing in my seat trying to calm myself down from the intensely uncomfortable awkward romantic scenes. Except this time I was accompanied my two of my good friends, who such as myself, have the maturity level of five year olds. Instead of being uncomfortable we were simply laughing our asses off (read: trying to be quiet but unable to control the laughter, causing crying, causing more laughter, causing us to spill our food everywhere [what a damn waste of Rasinets] causing more laughter, causing the fact that the entire theater probably hated us). I don't feel as bad as I should, I know due to the fact they they get married and go on a honeymoon and (SPOILER ALERT!!!!!) have sex, laughter is how I'm going to get through the fourth movie, Breaking Dawn. As with New Moon, the ONLY thing keeping this movie from going straight to the bottom of my list is the werewolves, and in particular, the intense werewolf/ Cullen tribe vs. newborn vampires battle scene. I may have involuntarily clapped when the werewolves jumped out of the forest. I may have involuntarily clapped twice. I tried to find a picture of that scene, but Google must be a twelve year old girl, since the only thing I could find is the above. I'm sorry.

While Twilight got two, and New Moon four (due to less Edward and more werewolves), this one will have to settle with three out of five (Edward came back, but still lots of werewolves). Also, if you can just make it funny, it's worth seeing.



Get Him To The Greek:
Totally different story! Any movie that can make me laugh my ass off hysterically simply because the main characters are so fucked up on drugs they stroke a furry wall for comfort, is more than enough to make it one of the best movies ever in my opinion. After seeing it I thought maybe I just enjoyed it because of my rampant immaturity, but I have yet to talk to anyone who doesn't completely agree with me. I don't know what else to tell you, other than: LOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLZOZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!

I give it five out of five.

Gaynelle and I also came to the conclusion by the end of the movie that Russell Brand is a sexy man (albeit a little gay), which is another supporting reason to go see it.



Now onto my complaints.

I'm going to DC on Wednesday to stay in a weekly rental, and hopefully find a permanent rental. I've been starving myself and hooking on the side all summer to be able to afford to move finally. Alright, that's not true at all, but it's makes my plight so much more desperate if you just go with it. Anywhoo, this week I plan on riding my bike all over DC begging landlords to give me an apartment, and I'm hoping the weather will be kind and not ridiculously hot, because I'm preparing for this to take for-fucking-ever, considering I'm trying to find something affordable but big enough for a couple (yes, boyfriend is moving in with me, I know, wheeeee!), but also something that accepts my cat and large moderately sized dog. You know all those movies where kids move to big cities to make it on their own and they have to stay in a really tiny studio and eat Ramen noodles all year, but it still works out and they're super duper happy? Well, finding a really tiny studio to accept you isn't easy and noodles get expensive, and even when you know the city like I do, it's STILL hard. Breathing feels expensive right now. I've got a good bit of money saved up, but I'm afraid to buy a .50 cent soda because I know enough of those will eventually lead to the disappearance of all my money and gahhhhh, it's so stressful.

Anyways, as much as I'd like to stay in Gulf Shores, AL and collect dirty oil money from BP (hah, NOT), my first steps to finally leaving start this week. Hopefully by mid August I'll be living in a studio in Northwest, serving tables at some fancy place in DuPont, and living a jolly little life.

So, adieu for now, I will be checking in sometime next week to update everyone on how my apartment search is going (yes the blog is coming back, as I told you it would when I moved). Wish me luck!

<33

PS. I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED ABOUT THIS, I CAN'T BELIEVE I ALMOST FORGOT TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT, OMG, DON'T JUDGE ME, BUT YEAH HERE YOU GO. Sorry for the all caps there for a second. Got carried away...